I have formulated a plan. Plan A.

I'm lazy. And broke.

So taking these things into account, there is no way in Hades I am going to be able to flit across the country looking for David. And then what would I honestly say when I caught up to him? Squeak? Yeah, probably.

So, here's Plan A.

I vote that whenever David goes on his solo tour that he takes me with him. Why is this a good plan? Several reasons:

1) I figure the band would want some sort of a mascot and/or pet. And I can totally do that job. And I am way better than a dog. First off, I'm housebroken. That's important. Second, I don't slobber. And I don't bark loudly. I do happen to stick my head out the window on long car rides and catch frisbees with my mouth. I am also a champ at rolling over and playing dead. Why get a pet dog when you could have your very own pet girl?

2) While on tour, I can document the experience in my writing. I figure this would probably be able to be published. Perhaps Rolling Stone would be interested? I know at the very least the posters here would love it. Who better to document the behind the scenes from the tour then a fan? Of course we will get some commentary from David, but he's busy being his awesome self and making the magic happen. So I vote he needs an on staff writer at all times. This could help me get my career off the ground. Kill two birds with one stone.

3) I could do all those little tasks of making sure everything runs smoothly. Does David need hair gel at three in the morning? Let's send Keeley. David having a craving for a cheeseburger? Let's send Keeley. David wants to see someone wrestle a mountain lion? Keeley. David needs ten bags of Peanut M&Ms and a liter of wheat grass juice? Send Keeley. (I don't even know what wheat grass juice is, but I can find out.) I highly doubt David has "diva" moments, but just in case. You might need a Keeley just for any rock star moments that may happen. I can clean a trashed hotel room in less than a half hour. And I can glue a smashed guitar back together. Really. Hot glue gun baby.

4) Let's not overlook the fact that David would get to meet ME. I am certifiably awesome. Or maybe just certifiable. Jury's still out. :/

So recap of Plan A:

Pros for me:
I get to meet and hang out with David.
Something awesome to do with my life for a little while to satisfy my need for escape and adventure.
Jumpstart my writing career in a big way.
I get to meet David.
I get to see the tour, like all of it. Every aspect of it.
Did I mention meet David?
Awesome story to tell the grandkids.

Pros for David:
On staff writer.
Pet girl.
Hair gel and cheeseburger emergency specialist.
Mountain lion wrestler.
Trashed hotel room cleaner upper and hot glue gun expert.
In short: He gets to meet me.

Cons:
*crickets*
Haven't thought of any.

Okay, so there's Plan A.
I think this will work.

Or not.
On to Plan B.

Going to see my dad's band tonight! I'm excited!
Oh oh, almost forgot about MOTD.(Mullet of the Day)
Four for the price of one special today.
http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o166/jlbyler/mullets.jpg

See you all tomorrow!
I'm going back to the drawing board.