(Date: first week that Light On was debuted online)

DavidCookOfficial Fan Report of Totally Accurate Truth - Week 1

While You Were Sleeping

Dear David Cook -

Hopefully, you finally took the first week off in months and had a nice long nap.

BTW, your single came out. Half the world loved it with a fiery passion and half the world thought it totally blew. So you are 50% more popular than the Wall Street bail-out plan.

You may not have had time yet to personally review the 16 million posts on the site since we caused it to melt down on Tuesday, so I have prepared an executive summary.

Fan 1: Love it! Wonderfully sung, classic anthem. Cannot wait for November.

Fan 2: David Cook's an a*hole and I hate his hair. Also, Daughtry!

Fan 3: David Cook is the most awesome chunk of protein to ever emerge from the glades of Tulsa. I know because I brought him a crippled orphan seal to sign on the tour, and not only did he, he totally hugged the seal. The he put the Sharpie up his nose. Love the single.

Fan 4: I've just submitted a graduate thesis on the profound changes in the music market and global warming that Light On has induced. David Cook has misused his sexy lace-up pants to single-handedly destroy decades of progress in energy conservation. However, it is a good single and will spank the hell out of the Billboard charts.

Fan 5: Meh.

Fan 1: Love! Fan 2: Hate! Fan 3: Orphan Seal! Fan 4: Global warming! Fan 5: Chris Cornell!

They fight. The forum blows up.

Next Week: On Your song goes on actual sale.

Can't wait.

xxoxoxoxoxo
kaydeecee reporting

Also, I am leaving the country immediately after posting this* so if anyone has any ire, please direct it to this guy **

* True!
** Not really!
*** Hey, that's not a seal! Whatever, it's a warm wet mammal. Close enough.

Please feel free to add your own Fan Report of Totally Accurate Truth below. Just make sure that, like mine, it is one hundred percent totally accurate and true.

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