I spent awhile tonight writing-up a blog entry about the performance of Hunger Strike from Thursday night. But when I got to the part where I actually had to write how I felt about it...I couldn't do it. That's the fourth (yes, fourth) time I've tried to put my feelings about that performance into words, and I failed all four times. Instead, the best I can do is toss out adjectives like "great," "awesome," "incredible," etc. But that doesn't even come close to describing how I actually feel about it.

Maybe there are just some feelings that can't be put into words.

One thing I *can* put into words is how much I love the friendship between David, Neal, and Andy...the strength of which is shown very clearly in that performance. In fact, I don't just love their friendship...I envy it. How lucky they are to have each other. I can only hope that one day I can be part of a friendship that strong.

I've always had what seemed to be high standards for friends. I had gotten to the point where I thought perhaps the reason I had no real-world friends was because no one could meet my standard for what a friend really is: someone who you can call at 2 AM and spill your problems to. Someone who will stick with you through thick and thin. Someone who would quite possibly give his/her life for you if the opportunity presented itself.

But I look at those three guys...and I can't help but wonder if maybe true friends exist after all.

I suppose I should follow-up on my last blog entry. I got the guts to talk to my mother a day or two after I posted that blog entry. To make a long story short, she was Ok with it, I bought a plane ticket, made a hotel reservation, and bought a ticket to the show. So I'm heading out to Tulsa on the day after Christmas. I suppose you could call it my Christmas present to myself. A very nice one at that.

In all honesty, it'll be quite shocking if I'm able to make it all day on the 27th without losing my stomach contents (to put it nicely). When I get nervous or excited about something, that's what tends to happen. I've pretty much resigned myself to the fact that it *will* happen...which sucks. But that's how I deal with stuff like that.

Now I know what y'all are saying: Geez, coolshades. Get a grip. It's just a show.

Oh but it's NOT just a show. It's Andy. ANDY!!!! GAH!!!

Ok calm down coolshades....calm down....

ANDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ANDYANDYANDYANDYANDY

I'm hopeless. Really, I am. I may not survive the day.

But if by some chance I can compose myself long enough to actually say something to him (and that would be a miracle, let me tell ya'), I might ask him what was going through his mind when he shot that smile at David after David introduced him during Hunger Strike.

I just have to know.