To describe my exact feelings about David is both the easiest and the hardest thing in the world. I'm someone who likes to rationalize and analyze things and figure out why I feel the way I do about things. And this question has not yet been answered to my satisfaction, though I have thought about it for a long time. Ever since the very beginning, in fact.

I started watching Top 20 week. I didn't know anything about any of the contestants except that one was Australian, one was Britney Spears’ old boyfriend, and one was a kid who had an amazing voice. I was not particularly excited about season 7 after a lackluster season 6. And I didn't see anyone I could get really excited about. But that was before David Cook came on.

Watching the video before his performance, I had no idea at first what to make of him. Here's this guy with this rocker hair and a cardigan playing a guitar and talking about being a word nerd! But something about him drew me in and completely hooked me. I didn't know if he could sing or not, but I was fascinated by him in a way I have never been before in my life. I still can't figure out exactly why. Looking back, maybe what happened was that I saw him for who he was, and liked him. And I admired him for being willing to put himself out there and be himself no matter what anyone else thought. Maybe that was a part of it, but not all. I'm still puzzling that one out.

Anyway, I started to get excited, but still needed to hear if he could sing or not before I was willing to commit. He sang All Right now, and man, now here was a rocker! It's still one of my (many) favorite performances. I really got into the song, and loved watching him strut his stuff on the stage. Could not take my eyes off him. And the way he told off His Smugness Simon the Only that it was the fans' opinion that mattered, (and therefore wrongly getting a reputation for being arrogant) - MY God, I think that was it. That was the moment I was well and truly hooked. I loved his spirit and his gumption to dare to sass Simon! That's what did it for me, angel!

I got really excited - here was someone I could cheer for! He was so good! I had found my dark horse to root for.

Then of course, the next week, he proved that he had what it would take to win - at least for me . He took a risk, changed up Hello in a really effective manner, and sang the fricking heck out of it. And that was the first week I noticed how incredibly handsome he was. Okay, so I was a little slow on the uptake there - I hadn't looked at a man in that way in 5 years, cut me some slack! (BTW, despite your insecurity, David Roland Cook, you are gorgeous. More on that later!)

I could itemize each week and tell you how this devotion to David grew, but I may not have that much space, so I'll just mention a few (David, you've already seen most of this next part if you read my letter to you from Charlotte, so you can skip down to the bottom!).

First, Innocent. I must admit, I didn't quite "get" the song at first, but then I'd never heard it before, and you can't really judge a new song by a 90 second snippet. In fact, this was the only week I can remember being afraid of him being voted out. Thank God he wasn't. Pat on the back to all Word Nerds for that! And I loved the white jacket he wore that night! And when I downloaded the full version of the song, I totally "got" why he picked that song, and I absolutely loved it! It is still my favorite of all the studio performances and I always flip through my iTunes and listen to it at least twice a day!

Always be my Baby. What a performance! I had been worried up till performance night because I thought no guy, not even David, could pull off a Mariah Carey song. But he did it - Lord, how he did it. And he had us all crying along with him knowing that his brother was there to see him perform so spectacularly. I think you already know this, but we all really support Adam while he struggles with his condition. His obvious love for both his brothers is another big reason why I adore this man. And his support of cancer research because of Adam's condition is such a testimony of the largess of his beautiful heart.

Let's talk about his best night, in my opinion. Top 2. First of all, he so deserved to be there. (Nothing against the others, but this season was really a two horse race the whole time.) And that night, he was in my opinion the best he had ever been. When he performed one of my favorite U2 songs of all time, I was just so pumped up. And when he chose to do The World I Know over trying to outdo any of his previous performances, I thought it was not only the right choice, but the perfect song. In that song, he put his heart and soul out there for the world to see, and said, in effect, "This is who I am, whether or not you vote for me."

And he did not deserve to get thrown under the bus by the judges. I know you just shake it off, angel, but we (your fans) were Very Upset. And it drove us to vote like crazy people. I know I have never voted as hard or as long for any other contestant in any season. I had both my mother and my cell phones, and I voted nonstop with both hands for every minute of those four hours. I was simply driven by the idea that David Cook deserved to win, not only because of his incredible performances, but because he was (and is) an incredible person, and he had worked so hard and for so long to realize his dream that I (and the rest of the Word Nerds) simply had to do our part and make sure that dream came true.

Anyway, at the end of voting, I was exhausted and my thumbs were too numb to hurt (although they did the following day). I must have put in a couple thousand calls between the two phones and only got through about 200 times. I didn't know if that was a good or bad sign. But I did the best I could for him -that's how much I thought, and still think of him.

Then came finale night. We fans had been hearing all kinds of rumors all day, and reading all different kinds of projections as to the outcome. All the journalists were convinced that Archie was going to win, but all the numbers that were reported gave to the win to our David. We didn't know what to think!

But we should have known that he'd come out on top. I enjoyed the finale for once, though suspense nearly killed me! I loved "Sharp-Dressed Man, and I am absolutely in love with that Luna! And the Guitar-Hero commercial... don't even get me started. Hellooooooo, nurse!!!!! Nuff said ‘bout that...

Anyway, I began to realize David was going to win when the Great American Idol Backpedal began. What I mean by that was all that "Oh, you're both so wonderful" BS. Puleese, where were they the night before with all this praise??? I'm glad Simon apologized to him - he needed to, even more so than the others. And I know, angel, that you didn't think so, but take my word for it - you did not deserve such harsh criticism from him, especially after he went on all those talk shows and said you should win. You deserved an apology for the slight, and I'm glad you got it.

Oh my, but he deserved to win! I was so proud (and I still am!). Don't get me wrong - even if he hadn't won, he has always been my American Idol and always will be. Winning a singing contest does not make him a winner - he already was one. So really, winning and the recording contract and all that comes with it are just the light on the candles on top of the sweet frosting on an already perfect cake (*or cookie? grin*) I wanted nothing but the best of everything for this man that I adore, and I'm so happy he has it now. And I'm even prouder than before!

Now, have I missed anything? Oh of course. I forgot the most important part! Why David Cook is my angel!

I call him my angel, well, because he saves my life every day. Whether from boredom, fear, insecurity, despair - with his light that comes from his beautiful heart and soul, he saves me again and again from the darkness that permeated my existence until he entered it. His music soothes me when I'm upset, and seeing that dear face always makes me smile, no matter what has happened in my day. His voice is utter magic, I swear! And those beautiful eyes, that beautiful smile...

Well, I don't need to go on, do I? It's kinda obvious (not to you, I know, angel, but to the rest of us! And as I've told you before, to me you are so intrinsically valuable apart from your finely formed mien).

I thank you, dear one, for the dear friends I have made because of you who are also helping me through and encouraging me. I would never have known them and known such acceptance and friendship if not for you. Another debt I owe you. At this rate, I know I will owe you more than I could ever begin to repay - in fact, I already do. No matter how many records and singles I buy, no matter how many concerts I attend, it will still never be enough, David.

I said it before and I'll say it again - it's YOU, that wonderful sweet funny person that you were before this craziness happened, that has absolutely won me over. Just regular David Roland Cook from Kansas City/Tulsa with his beautiful heart and beautiful soul (And his beautiful music, although if you never sang or played again, you would still be as valuable and special a person as you are right now). That's who I voted for, and that is the standard to which I hold all others as well as myself . Not that you're perfect - I know enough of you never to be able to say that! - but... I guess what I want to say is, don't ever change - I mean fundamentally -, not for anybody. You are a treasure just the way you are. Absolutely perfect in your imperfection.

I write this as Light On loops on through the night. I love it beyond my capability of expression. And I adore the man who sings it above all others. Now, and always, David!

That is why I am here on this site - why I am even alive right now. Because of David Cook, my angel.

Any questions???